Thank God for Dorena

This entry is meant to thank God for my dear Dorena, who in spite of staying at SengKang, is willing to come by to meet me for lunch.

I am upset to the point of being a tad depressed. I am stressed and upset cos of conflict of work interests. I am a simpleton who cannot handle nonsensical politics, I usually leave it to God to settle them for me, I crumble at the mere hardening of the human spirit. This time it affects me, cos I heard it for myself, seen it and was totally caught off guard.

In short, thou I am a woman, I hate women. They are the sweetest things there are BUT they are also the most vile and lowdown creatures. Not even a man can beat them. Women win wars not battles. And they need not be violent to do so. Thats the scary point.

I AM SO BL**DY upset..................... OH GOD! What did I do or not do? It was the most simple and innocent question, WHY GOD, Why must it be so complicated once it reaches her hands???

Please protect me from ALL evil, seen or unseen I pray. Lift my spirits up and grant me joy everlasting. I so so wanna cry. I am so useless..... small things like that can get to me! WTH.... but its my make-up. My DNA.

I am so freaking sensitive lah! I hate myself at times for being so sensitive. I still got to pretend I have things under control and smile! I got to freaking *smilez* ITS SO FAKE LAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When all I want to do is take leave and watch a good movie and cry..... CRY my heart out and all will maybe be fine again. *cry baby mode*

I am not as tough as people think I am.... only Daniel and a few closer sisters know how feeble I am internally and emotionally.

I am trying to get there, to be mentally strong, but its so cold and hard. I rather have someone to count on Lord...